actual-ironman-tonystark:

queerqueensansa:

postllimit:

mom: hey *dad’s name* oh whoops i mean *brother’s name* oh no *sister’s name* i mean *name of the family goldfish* ah shoot i meant *your name* can you get down here really quick i need something

my dad has literally called me by his own name. 

my mother has called me our cats name who has been dead for five years

multiple times

nyehs:

HFFGSDFSDJHF

nyehs:

HFFGSDFSDJHF

toastdurr:

vagisodium:

i bet my tongue is stronger than yours wanna find out

hELL YES

image

maureenstarkeys:

cheap clothing sites ($10 and over; most are under $20):

glitterandmetal-yt-da:

batreaux:

You bump into a man on the subway wearing a trenchcoat. You apologize and he responds “Its alright. We’re only human. All of us. All of us here are human. Yep. Very human. I’m probably the most human here! You betcha.” and then the trenchcoat falls and the figure collapses and roughly 1000 salamanders scatter around the train 

are you ok?

kamidiox:

crsbbq:

Imagine finding this in your backyard…

Minion? Is that you? 

kamidiox:

crsbbq:

Imagine finding this in your backyard…

Minion? Is that you? image

jaclcfrost:

but if a playground doesn’t have swings is it really even a playground. or is it just. a disappointment

carry-on-my-wayward-butt:

mamafriesmeal:

saint-magi:

May I have the baby Griffin?

OMG THE BABY CHIMERA IS BACK ON MY DASHBOARD

BABIES

kitten-burrito:

I just needed this really bad.  ^u^

kitten-burrito:

I just needed this really bad.  ^u^

thewinterfrostgiant:

"bucky is a villain"

image

"bucky is the new loki"

image

"bucky is a brainwashed assassin who is generally a good guy but is forced to do bad things"

image

sucysucyfivedolla:

like it’s not “whoops I’m PREGNANT AGAIN tee hee time for an abortion!!” 

nobody fuckin does that. nobody

it’s more along the lines of

do you want an abortion or do you want to die

do you want an abortion or do you want to watch your baby die after a week

do you want an abortion or do you want your life to fall apart around you because of a child you are either unable or unfit to support

do you want to give up a fetus or a living, breathing baby